God is crazy! We got married Nov. 11 with the thought, "ok, we'll use birth control because it would be nice to have a couple years to ourselves...but really - it's in God's hands and we'll trust his timing. He'll know when we're ready to be parents."
Well, watch out world! I have a midget growing in my belly and it'll be out in about 6 months to wreak havoc! Of course our amazing parenting skills will not be tested by our little angel, right?!
We went last Thurs. and got a sonogram, which was weird as I've only ever seen a ultrasound been done...you know - TV, movies...so it was extremely weird to see their "camera"...well, we saw him/her and he's kicking and swimming with all its might. "THAT is in ME?!" It sunk in for like 2 seconds as we watched him/her wailing on the screen. Then the Dr. turned up the sound and we heard its heartbeat...IT'S ALIVE!!!
So, we're making room in our lives - getting rid of stuff of which we thought, "maybe I can use this some day" and trying to "make house" a little faster now that there's somewhat of a time limit. Our one bedroom apartment must turn into an inviting and efficient home for our little one...and guests.
Since we've had the thought of me being pregnant my husband has been spoiling me rotten. He's been cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, and making sure I get a good night sleep. I feel a bit like a fat queen. I've been nauseated the entire time...MORNING sickness...ya right! I just can't wait to get to the JOYS of being pregnant. On top it, I can't eat as much of my favorite food - Mexican - without getting acid reflux.
I know this all sounds a bit cynical and I'm praying God will take hold of my heart and give me an amazing amount of love for this baby. I still question if I'm ready to be a mom, but He knows…and His timing is perfect. I'm afraid motherhood will mean losing sleep and having no energy, but I know God won't give me more than I can handle...whether I think so at the time or not. I'm sure He knows that having a baby will make me press into Him to sustain me. Who wants a life of comfort where you can become stale anyway?!